The condolence should be personal and express your deep emotions. Here are 10 tips on how to write a condolence letter and what to say and what not to say.Quick do's and don'ts for offering comfort when someone dies: Do offer a distraction. Find a sympathy message to send to someone who lost their mother, including ideas for texts, DMs, and facetoface conversations. When conveying your condolences stick to "I'm very sorry for your loss" and avoid the temptation to say something "profound" or anything of the sort. If there is more than one beneficiary, each one must complete a separate form. • The beneficiary must submit a death certificate. Please accept my heartfelt condolences during this difficult time of grief and mourning. My fatherinlaw died on my 61st birthday and other family members and good friends have lost spouses, siblings and parents. The ultimate objective of writing a condolence letter is to offer your condolences to the grieving friend.