Include specific examples of how the person has helped you or someone else, or how he or she has been a leader or an inspiration. What parents and witnesses need to know about character reference letters to the court for child custody.Includes a downloadable sample and template. In this article, we will discuss how to write a formal letter to a judge, along with the proper format and a sample letter. Introduce yourself in the opening paragraph. At the start of the letter, introduce yourself and explain how you know the defendant. A character letter to a judge should establish your credibility, paint a full picture of the defendant and be respectful, among other things. Good character reference letters help the judge understand the defendant as an individual. Ideally, the writer should express how he or she knows the defendant. Basically anything they would like to say about you, preferably positive.