Write a long, nasty, mean-spirited letter to explain everything that they dislike about the church and articulate their own self-pity at length. -By Dr. Don Owsley (relavate.Keep your former church in your prayers and speak well of it. Church members should exercise graciousness and courtesy in leaving a church. Try to leave graciously. Leaving a local church is a decision which should not be made lightly. It requires careful thought and fervent prayer.